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  • Marisa Wolf

Perspectives

Do you remember last year there was some uproar when it went round the internet that some people have internal monologues and some don't? Whether they were internal-monologue or not, people were just absolutely floored that something that seemed so fundamentally, foundationally human wasn't true for everyone, and there were more than a few existential crises.


I love that. I love things that shift the ground of what you knew to be true and make you reconsider assumptions/how you think about things.


I wish we had more conversations about that - more real conversations, with ourselves and others, about what makes us tick. Maybe it would help break us away from all the "pick a team and defend it to the end of sanity because the other team is only terrible stupid people who can't possibly understand the world like we do, on this, the perfect team" that's so rampant.


It's easier to be reductive, and it lends itself to snappy talking points that capture attention. But it won't change anything, at least not for the better.


I believe a lot of the current wave of divisiveness is being seeded - the more we turn on each other, the less we can hold people in power accountable (lifelong politicians, billionaires, the sort of people who flood political campaigns with money to buy their agenda, etc). Having real conversations (with reasonable people, you owe nothing to people who are committed to literally killing you because of your race/gender/sexuality) can be a way to counteract that seeding.


Here's a thing you may or may not know about me - while I am often warm, and cheerful, and optimistic, under that I am...oppositional.



The more politicians and Shouty Shoutersons want us at each others' throats, the more I want to know what's in it for them. There are things we need to fight for, don't get me wrong, but there is a whole lot of manufactured outrage that is taking away from the actual real fights.


Taking down a Golden Girls episode because they had mud masks isn't fighting racism. Has Hulu looked at their hiring practices? Their retention and promotion policies and how those impact staff? Nah. They did a performative thing, patted themselves on the back for solving racism, and disgusted everyone in the process, taking away from the actual fight that needs fighting.


Let's not be performative. Let's do the things. Have weird, deep, real conversations. Don't dismiss an entire group of people because their extremists are loud and wrong and awful. Hold the loud and wrong and awful extremists who are nominally on your side accountable for being awful.


Be a person. We can't let team-think make us forget that we are surrounded by complicated, nuanced, fascinating people who are doing the best they can. Do the best you can. Whether we have that internal monologue or not, we're all human, and deserve better than what's on offer for us out there right now.

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